I inhale a Deep breath as I reflect on 2015 and begin to write this. This has been a year of deep Release and Soul Reconciliation for me. I’ve walked through the hottest fires of transformation, and looked into the darkest depths of my SOUL.
Even though over the years, I have done some work on releasing my past demons and doubts, this year, I felt compelled to go on a deeper excavation of who I really am (Multidimensional Angelic on a mission).
Seems it was time to handle the Karma. Now, some believe in this and some don’t but that is not the issue here.
Everywhere I went, I felt like a dark Karmic Cloud was following me and I kept bumping into dis-harmony, rejection and plain unhappy situations. Something was blocking my Good and I had to get to the bottom of it.
My professional life was no saving grace like it had been before. Despite my gift for helping other create magic and miracles, things had spiraled to blasé’. Day after day, I could not shake the nagging feeling that I was not making any real progress on my path. I was uninspired by the fact that I seemed to be doing the same things I had been doing for over a decade and, 3d reality felt just as dense as ever.
It wasn’t just that I was two years out of my second divorce and adjusting to the transition.
It wasn’t just that I had yet to truly heal my childhood emotional neglect.
It wasn’t that circumstances were forcing me to move house before I was really ready.
It was all that PLUS I had lost my bearings.
I was adrift at sea—no longer clear about my own Purpose & Destiny.
Without my Purpose what was my Purpose?
My Purpose was the one thing that I always thought would anchor me to this earth walk.
And now the Divine seemed to want me to let that go too.
Who was I really if I wasn’t who I thought I was?
Was Destiny Guide just another mask that was being lifted off?
It seemed Goddess/God wanted me to discover a new Truth.
And so business slowed waaaaay down.
Some of my best clients dropped me.
Fate or Destiny?
I felt abandoned, forsaken and completely out of sorts.
My ego resisted this search for New Truth. I just wanted to keep doing what I had been doing. (Even though I knew I needed to expand myself and the way I doing everything in my life and my business.)
Just like any other human, I was resisting the call for Change, the call to Go to a Higher Level, the call to become even more of a pure Vessel for the Divine. I am smart enough to know I needed some HELP.
The first guide was known as a Karma Doctor and he mentioned a phrase that rang true, through and through: I was experiencing DESTINY DESPAIR.
But I had to keep on keeping on, so with a new guide by my side, I continued to work with some clients. As fate would have it, these clients were perfect reflections to remind me of everything I seemingly could NOT have myself: an amazing lifestyle, tons of money, a partner and family.
This made the pain worse. My mind started to tell me that “everyone else gets to have what they want” but not you.
This was all in perfect timing, as it conveniently coincided with a mid-life crisis.
With terror I wondered, “is this as good as my life is going to be?” I had to face some pretty grim facts:
I had not yet met the love of my life, was not going to have children, and possibly might be struggling to be myself in a world that, so far, was not really receiving me or my uniqueness.
The wounded healer could no longer work wounded.
The Chinese symbol for Crisis means both “danger and opportunity”.
So I had to Surrender to my SOUL and do a deep dive into my greatest hurts and disappointments and find out where they stemmed from at the Soul Level. And so I enlisted the help of a personal friend and some Healing professionals to help me find my way back to my WHOLENESS.
Finding My Way
I enrolled in a group program about Healing The Magdalene Wounds and met regularly with my Soul Sister, LeeAnn Taylor. Together, and along with a myriad of other healers here and there (as needed), I opened my heart, shed the tears, and tried to find the meaning in my own Soul’s Journey.
From working through Mother wound issues, karmic entanglements, and facing my own worse fears of feeling like an outcast and persecuted just for being a Woman, I looked where Spirit led me.
Some of what I discovered is that I had died in child birth and had lost a lot of my soul power and ability to HOLD onto things in life. (registering in the 3rd chakra: solar plexus/power center).
This made a lot of sense since I was not going down the road of traditional mother in this life. Finding these buried aspects of myself helped to sooth my heartache.
Upon doing various Akashic record readings, I discovered that my SOUL had experienced a lot of betrayal, loss of self-esteem, holding back my power from past lives, which now contributed to a big part of my heart becoming shut down to receiving the kind of Love and Success that I knew was possible. (yikes)…this couldn’t be my fate unless I let it be. I know from my own Shamanic work with clients we have to make what is unconscious Conscious in order to truly transform.
I remembered one of my favorite quotes by Carl Jung, “I am not what happened to me, I choose who I become.”
This work was about clearing and healing my Very SOUL.
I was called to find out what had happened, so I could make some new choices.
And it has not been easy. The healing of my Destiny Despair has been intense, scary and panic-attacky.
More than once the tell-tale sign of severe anxiety struck allergic reactions in my nose, eyes and throat.
I even resorted to breathing into a paper bag on more than one occasion.
But I made it. I did the work. I faced my darkness, embraced my shadow, forgave myself and others for the shame, the blame, the trauma and the drama.
What I know for sure is that we all need each other to get to where we are going.
There are guides, healers and teaches along our Path—and to truly walk the Hero’s Heroine’s Journey, we have to have the courage to admit we require assistance.
What is Next?
I don’t know where my journey will take me next, but I do know that I am stronger for having done this work.
I know that I have activated my own powerful Priestess-healing abilities to guide people go to the Core of themselves to find what they need to create the happy life that desire and deserve. I now can fully Trust my ability to help heal other people’s hearts so they can love and honor themselves again.
Even though many times I felt like the flames of transformation would burn me to a crisp, I kept showing up for what my SOUL wanted me to see and release so I could call more energy, vitality and TRUTH back into my Being.
And Miraculously, What is coming through me now is a more purified version of my Divine consciousness.
I am Fired up for whatever is on my path and headed straight for me, for now I can see it with new eyes and feel it with a new Heart.
In partnership with the Divine, Dr. Michelle Casto provides Divine Harmonic Energy Transmissions and Destiny Activations for awakening Lightworkers and Change Agents dedicated to being the change they wish to see in the world. Through her writing, mentoring and healing work, she assists her clients to dissolve hidden subconscious programming so they can step fully into their Power, Passion and Purpose. Her commitment is to guide awakening men and women to experience a blissful, purposeful and successful life by learning how to become crystal clear Vessels of Light so they can fulfill their greatest Destiny. A prolific creator and author, her book, The Destiny Discovery: Find Your Soul’s Path to Success is a must-read that will gracefully guide you through your Soul’s journey. Visit www.BrightMichelle.com